Note: This article was written just days after the world had welcomed in the new year of 2003 and shortly after the war in Iraq had begun. It represented my feelings for the year that lay ahead and my sadness for the situation's that were taking place at the time. My wish for each year remains the same.      Bonnie Lamrock/June15, 2004

When the clock struck 12:00 and the New Year became official, I paused for a moment and thought about the long and adventurous journey that lay ahead for the world.

In my heart I was hoping that ‘this' would be the year for ‘change'.

A prayer of ‘hope' at the stroke of midnight was a way of starting 2003 off in a positive light.

I had many hopes for this year, hopes that cannot be accomplished ‘all at once', but with love and support from the world, they can most assuredly be accomplished in time.

Determined to contribute to my dream of a new and ‘positive' 2003, I decided to donate my services to helping children. I became involved in campaigns for ‘Missing' Children as well as Diversity work.

But still this did not seem enough; I wanted to do more to make things better. My hopes remained high as the weeks went on, finding charity work wherever I could, but sadly to say, my feelings of encouragement soon slipped into pessimism as I watched our fellow brother's attack one another in a war of words within the media circuit. Dumbfounded by the brutal attacks on Michael Jackson, I was sadly awakened to a reality that my dreams of a positive 2003 were fading by the minute.

I couldn't understand where all the hate was coming from? So much negative energy being focused on one man? A man who has taught me, by his ‘own' example, to help needy children and to seek peace in the world.

This was not a good sign for my hopes of a positive year.

As the weeks went on I could only do my best to contribute wherever I could, supporting the good, and opposing the negative.

Aware of a possible war, I could only pray it could be avoided, sadly, this wasn't so.

Words just cannot express the sadness I feel for the lives that are being lost during such a terrible situation. I cry each day for the well being of our troops, for the children who seek refuge away from the danger, I pray for the troops that are still out on the field and have been given knowledge of the loss of their partner, or friend.

The family's at home who patiently wait for their loved ones; life must be extremely difficult for them. Some of these family's will be receiving news that their family member has past on.

There is no question in my mind that we all need to join together and try to comfort each other and show love to one another.

My hopes of a peaceful 2003 are at a stand still.

I think back to that night, many weeks ago, as the clock struck 12:00 and 2003 had made its arrival to the world, I think of the hopes and dreams I had for this New Year,,,,,,,,,,,, never could I have imagined the sadness that is happening right now. This is ‘not' a time for me to give up on hope for peace; it's a time to become even ‘more' inspired. There are too many people that need us. Especially the troops and their families, as well as the innocent children forced helplessly along for the ride. I'll help if I can and I know others will do the same.

To the victims of this war, I want to end this article with my offer of love and prayer's.

May you find peace in the knowledge that your loved ones are true HERO'S .

Bonnie Lamrock / [email protected]